(c) Malka Maxwell 2013
Empowerment is going through life and being able to draw upon strength to move ahead in life. What makes empowerment such a difficult thing to deal with is that no matter how "together" you feel, there will be that ONE thing that throws you off your axis.

Let me explain by giving an example. A few years ago i published my first book. Now, for me that was the greatest accomplishment for a variety of reasons. Most because I felt that I had taken a situation (reaching a career plateau) and doing something positive about.

I was pleased with my marketing plan, pleased with my extensive knowledge on self publishing etc. I remember a friend of mine said at the time, well, "I can do that" and that was all she said.

At the time, I was a bit surprised by the reaction, because I felt that as her friend, I had been so happy for her for all of her triumphs. I felt that as a good friend she would be happy for me too.

Looking back, I now understand a few things. One the fact that I wrote the book, and her reaction to it was her reaction to not have thought of it. I believe people seem to strike out at something negatively first. Second, because this person was a long time friend, I was hurt tremendously by this person. The reason is simple, I again NEVER thought that a friend of mine would react that way since I am supportive of their feats in life.

What does this have to do with empowerment? My reaction to this behavior was to not discuss the book, and then eventually I stopped talking about opportunities that arose and the more I did this the worse I felt. I had a hard time writing, and enjoying what I like.

Then, one day this all came to a halt. I decided that instead of not talking about what I was doing and feeling proud of myself, I just needed to find a different crowd. Once I was able to lean on someone who was fair, and offered good advice I felt a lot better.

This action of finding another outlet to express what I was feeling became the empowerment. When I stopped kvetching about "why someone would say" or "why someone would do" and began to focus on "how my actions, creations etc benefit others" I was able to go down that path.

Again you may ask how do do you keep yourself empowered?

The first way is a two part step: identify what is empowerment and second find someone who you can lean on that will be brutally honest if need be to help you find this in yourself.  Empowerment or even self empowerment incorrectly attained means you stole it from someone else. You put someone else down, you harassed them bad mouthed them etc just so that you can make them go away while you use their ideas for yourself.All too often especially professionally this happens a lot. When someone experiences this it is often traumatizing. the effects are long lasting and for most people unchangeable.

I want to say that all hope is not lost. You can bounce back or become empowered. It may take a long time  and you may stumble, but keep going and put those haters in THEIR place! think this over....next step to empowerment is in the next post.

Malka Maxwell is a Mental Health Expert with approx 15 years working with adults and children who have Developmental Disabilities. Malka Maxwell is Author Of How To Get Ahead With Resumes(revised), a SEO Content Writer.


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